Day 68

We invited our 7 year old grand daughter to spend the night with us last evening. She's been in isolation for many weeks, so we felt safe doing so.

What a joy she is to have around. Truly, to see the world through a child's eyes is a treasure and a learning experience.

We brought out games and puzzles and art projects as we prepared for a night of fun and games.

First thing we did, was open a new game called Turtles and Flips.  It's a game for kids 6+ and over. It included cards and tokens...so simple, right?

Wrong!  My husband and I spent 30 minutes trying to understand the game rules before we gave up and put the darned game away.

 WHAT????    2 educated adults couldn't figure out the rules?

Then, we opened up the Match Game box. It's a game where you mix up matched pairs of items and place them face down on a table surface as you take turns flipping up 2 cards at a time looking for matched pairs. Simple, right?

Yes, except that Anthony and I realized we were matched up against a 7 year old memory wizard that had the ability to recall the location of a particular card flipped up to 10 moves previously. 

How is that even humanly possible?

We played 3 games. The Wizard won all three games and they weren't even close. 

WHAT????    2 educated adults couldn't remember where matching pieces were located from one turn to another?

She finally got tired and as I was tucking her in bed, I sat on the bed and happened to see myself reflected in the dresser mirror that faces the bed.

That was a big mistake.  Reality hit home. Quarantine eating has taken its toll on me.

I took action.

Today Anthony was asking me why all the mirrors in the house were now "white washed" below my shoulder level.

Day 67

What can I say?

Have we descended into a world of madness?

A white police officer puts a choke hold on an African American man as he's begging to breathe.  This happens in broad daylight in full view of many people.

And not one bystander rushes over to help? No one confronts the officer.  Even though there was a risk of being arrested, no one came forward to help?

If it had been a mad dog chewing on this man's leg, are you going to tell me no one would have attempted to pry the dog off of the man's body?   

                         

If it had been a child being beaten?

If it had been someone being sexually assaulted?

It's easy to say I would have done so, but I wasn't there. Would fear of police retaliation have paralyzed me?

A man is dead.  And stores are being looted and burned.

Rioting thugs are not being confronted by the police. Store owners, property owners who are still suffering economic woes are now hit full force with economic ruin.  Many of them are people of color.

Shelves have been  stripped of electronics, home decor, clothing and  lawn equipment.

And George Floyd is still dead.  And so is this city's economy.

If this isn't madness, tell me what is.

Day 65

I just got back from the grocery store because we needed some essential items.  It's funny what I now consider an essential because 3 months ago, I would have just walked right by some of these things and never have even considered putting them in my basket.

To start....I have become a chewer.  If I were strictly an ice chewer it might be an indication that I am anemic. But it's not ice I'm craving to chew.  It's nuts, M&M's, popcorn, stuff  like that. 

I have always hated jelly beans, but now for some insane reason I'm buying bags of them and munching on them as I watch TV.   They are sweet and chewy and they are satisfying. And since I've been watching lots of TV, then it means lots of jelly beans.  I hope this is a better choice than the others I've mentioned but my clothes are telling me otherwise.

Ice cream has always been a take it or leave it until a friend mentioned  Publix Special Edition flavors available only until August 2020. With a deadline looming, you know I just had to taste at least one flavor, which then lead to my trying another flavor and another and another.

So, these are 2 new essentials always found in my shopping cart now.  I might have been ashamed to admit this before; but now, who cares?

But let me ask about behaviors that were once acceptable in a grocery store and whether they still are.

How do you feel about someone  shopping for pre-packaged meats picking up and handling several packages while looking for the correct weight or appearance of the contents ? 

Should a shopper pick up a package and then follow a policy of "You touched it so you have to buy it"? or is it okay to search until the right one is found?

Today, there was a woman standing in front of the ground beef packages and picked one up and reached for another package before making her selection when a male customer hissed at her told her she had to buy the package she touched.

 She froze; I didn't. 

I'm Sicilian. I looked right at this man and I reached around her and picked up 2 packages and put them down before selecting a different one. The man walked off without saying anything to me.  How do you feel about this?

What about loose veggies?  Is it okay to touch more than one tomato  before finding the right one? Or again......you touch you buy?

Are we at the point where we are scared to touch anything that others might have touched?  Are we at the point we're willing to intimidate others because we think we have a right to? 

Will we ever get to the point where we will be social with each other again?

God, I sure hope so.

Day 64

Interesting way to start the day this morning.

The conversation started off well

.

We were talking about what we would do for dinner this evening. After a few comments and suggestions and thoughts about cravings and what we had here to prepare, the conversation took an interesting turn.

After a pregnant pause between comments, I felt it.  I can sense when something is coming that I'm not going to be happy hearing. Maybe it's the look in his eyes.  Or the tone of his voice shifts ever so slightly.

After 56+ years of being with this man, I have become quite intuitive.

And then, he said it.

"You know, lately we haven't been eating as healthy as we should."

I looked at him and said nothing.  I wanted to let him go on to see what else he had to say.

The silence was a bit awkward, but I made no comment.  I just looked him straight in the face.

Foolishly, he went on to say that we probably should be including more salads and veggies in our daily diet.  He said that to ME, who has been in the kitchen preparing a meal every single night during this sweet period of rediscovery and togetherness.

Let me explain that his contribution to meals is simply coming to the table when I tell him the food is ready.

So, I smiled and said that I agreed. Then I went further to suggest that I would continue to prepare the main dish and sides and he could join me in the kitchen to prepare a salad  or/and some green vegetables. Now mind you, the veggies are frozen and need only to be micro-waved.  How hard is it to slice tomatoes and chop lettuce and dress the salad with a dressing I have already put together? Not difficult at all.

And then, he said it.

"I don't think so.  That's really not my cup of tea."

He should never have said that to a Sicilian woman. After all these years, he didn't know better?

Day 63

Here we are.  Isn't this where we are everyday now? For the most part, on the inside looking out.

Caught in a conundrum.....the ability to go out and safely mingle with others but tempered with the fear of doing so.

We will be celebrating our 57th wedding anniversary in July. I have to say that these last 63 days have proven to be the most difficult tests of "togetherness" we've experienced in all of the years we've known each other. 

You'll understand what I mean when I tell you that I have a good divorce attorney's phone number on speed dial.....just in case.

We are still learning lessons on a daily basis.

Some of which are:

Sometimes honesty is not the best policy.

It's good to have more than one TV in the house.

Gritting your teeth can lead to TMJ.

Biting your tongue is better than saying what you think.

My next home will not have a working kitchen.....only a microwave oven and a mini-fridge.

When I said "I do" so many years ago there was an understanding of what was expected in the marital agreement.  And that was fine.

But, I never signed on to cook meals for 63 days in a row.  Did you?

I don't EVER again want to hear the words, "Honey, what's for dinner?"

I'm ready to retire from the kitchen duties.

Day 61

Let me pick up where I left off yesterday and tell you about the rest of my day.....

My Mom loved cactus pears and considered them a delicacy and I agree.   I only got to taste them after she picked them, cleaned them and prepared them.

There are things about cactus pears I was not aware of.  They're also known as prickly pears and for a good reason.

There's an empty lot not far from our home that has several cactus type trees growing on it.  Yesterday was the first time I saw cactus pears growing on the trees and they were a beautiful, rosy color and just so tempting to pick.

So, I walked over to the lot, picked the fruits, wrapped them in cloths and placed them in the pockets of  my oversized trousers (pajama bottoms, actually)

I kinda knew right away I shouldn't have done that.  Immediately my hands started to sting and itch and so did the sides of my thighs that were directly under the pockets.

 Lesson learned...those spiny little things all over those fruits are similar to stinging nettles.  I threw away the pears, the cloths and the pajama bottoms because those things had imbedded themselves into the very fiber of the fabrics and would not come out.

I'll never pick those things again.

But, to today.....

I went through the drive through at a local bank today requesting a certified check in a larger amount than usual. Immediately I could sense this wasn't a welcome withdrawal.  I was told the manager had to approve the withdrawal.

Then I had to show several forms of identification and lots of stall tactics. And then the questions....Why was I withdrawing the money? What was I going to do with it?  Was I sure I wanted to withdraw this amount?  And finally, I got ticked off and  fed up and just told the teller that I was being blackmailed and this was pay-off money and that I needed it ASAP.

I should not have done that.

 Apparently, the teller had no sense of humor and  alerted the Bank Security Officer, who then came out to my car and searched to see if I was alone in my car or being threatened by someone hiding in the back seat.

It took a lot of talking to convince the officer that I was kidding so that they'd give me my check.

I  know ya'll think I make these things up, but I assure you this is my life.....Very few dull moments.

Day 60

Where have I been?  I don't mean physically.  I mean mentally.

I had a rude awakening yesterday. I had a reality check.

I'm  reading so much about the "vulnerable" persons that need to be protected.  The News is focused on the seniors who are frail and in need of protection from this virus. There are recommendations that they stay in quarantine even longer than the younger folk. They should have others bring them their foods and staples and not go to the stores so as not to risk contamination. They should even consider not rejoining the work force.

Yesterday was my day for grocery shopping. And since it's become my Social Event of the week, I took great pains to look presentable.

I combed my hair, applied my make-up.....with emphasis on the eyes since that's the only thing that can be seen with a facial mask on........put on a pair of big hoop earrings and was ready to go.

And I looked in the mirror.   SHOCKER.....The person looking back at me wasn't the same person looking out at the reflection.

And that's okay.

It turns out that the "They" the News is trying to protect is, in fact, ME.

I just don't relate to the age category into which I'm being lumped. Is this weird?

I "see" myself and many of my friends as persons who still have some active Life left in them.  Are we the exceptions?

To those of you in my age bracket, I ask you, " Do you see yourself as a person who should relegate yourself to sitting on the sidelines, watching the leaves fall from the trees or do you see yourself as a "kick ass" kind of person who intends to live and enjoy Life until you just can't anymore"?

I have no intention of trading my game time, kicking shoes for slippers anytime soon.

 Who is on my team?

Day 59

Geez!  So many online ads selling promises of youth and beauty to women suffering from boredom who have too much time on their hands.  They look too hard at their wrinkles, dry skin, grey roots, droopy jowl lines, saggy necks....I could go on.

.

I cannot believe how many foolish, idiotic women fall for these online beauty scams and then complain they have been taken advantage of. What simpletons!

These companies are frauds, post fake videos, have fabricated testimonies from celebrities.  They have hidden charges written in fine print. They are liars and cheats and just want to take your hard-earned money! What scumbags!!!! And for the most part, their "secrets" just don't work.  They prey on the gullible and have no conscience when doing so.

The latest is a do it yourself remedy for a saggy neck.

Apparently there is a very small type of tape contraption that will tighten the loose skin under your chin line. You're supposed to grab the extra skin under your chin and bring it to the back of your neck. Then simply tape the skin just under your hairline at the nape of the neck. 

The demo video shows a live camera shot of the before and after appearance of the much older model. Very convincing, but we know the truth.

 Another one of those "Too good to be true" pitches. Haven't we seen enough of them?

Well, it's really uncomfortable. And it would work best if you have longer hair to cover the
"lump" at the back of your neck.  And there is no way to do this without looking like a dried up old turtle from the front.  


But if you're willing to endure the process, you should be aware that if you live in Florida where it's hot on many days, and you  should start to perspire, the tape will lose its grip...and not necessarily on both sides, at the same time. 

 Those people  know that and still they sell this junk.

Day 58

I started this "adventure" as a novice...knowing little....but attempting to merely survive what I thought would be 30 days of self-isolation.

Little did I know I'd still be adventuring 58 days later. I'm no longer a novice; I now feel like a Learned Sage.

I've learned much from others as well as from my own experiences......some good, some disastrous.

I've learned that 1 pound can be gained in a day.  I've learned that this same 1 pound will take 2 1/2 weeks to lose.

I've learned a fluorescent tube light, when placed it a bag to smash before disposal will not just break, it will explode....through the bag...and send shards of glass everywhere.

I've learned that wine makes an excellent substitute for a mouth wash and gargle.  Just swallow and don't expectorate it.

I now understand why some people practice polygamy and why it's okay with the multiple wives.  I'd give anything for additional wives to be in charge of meals on an alternating basis.

Going for a long car drive can be relaxing until the reality kicks in that no bathrooms are open and available for use. It only takes one car trip to experience this and you'll stay inside for the duration of isolation.

As a result, I can be found at home if you need/want to get in touch with me.

Day 57

There are many things one could say about filters. Some things are medically related, some are fact related and some are hygiene related.

For myself, the best filter I have is the one that connects my thoughts to my words.

I promise you, that if I didn't have this filter I'd be a social pariah, shunned and ostracized and likely incarcerated.

Yesterday I was trying to recall the name of a comic whose routine included an outrageous rant of things he was thinking and wanted to say followed by what he actually did say.

I have a mouth on me. I don't always use a genteel lady's vocabulary. And I can slice with words before the first drop of blood is even evidenced.

 This comic  was years ahead of his time. While his jokes made me laugh, I didn't realize he was teaching me some valuable Life lessons

.

I wish others had watched his shows and would put into practice what he preached.

Frankly, I'm tired of hearing and reading insulting comments made "in defense" of one's political position or beliefs.  Some are not only insulting, they are cruel and intended to inflict permanently etched painful "gotchas".  People are labeled with ".......ist" words that do not apply.  Enough is enough in my opinion.

Once we begin a conversation with inflammatory words it's a signal for the other person to "put up his dukes" and the lines of communication shut down.

Trust me, if I can play nice, others certainly could, too. 

How about trying?

Day 56

I took the day off yesterday to do absolutely nothing except to Time Travel through old pictures.

I took the time to go through many saved pictures of family get togethers, birthdays, anniversaries and events like that.

While the memories touched me and made me smile, the stark reality that we'll likely never go back and be able to casually assemble in those ways without care or worry  hit home.

Will those concerns be justified?  I don't know. Will the risk to throw caution to the wind be worth it?  I don't know.

What I do know is there's a generation growing up that will never experience the carefree lifestyles the people of my age grew up living.

They won't even know what they are missing. They won't know how good it feels to get and give a hug when greeting a friend. Or to get a pat on the shoulder for a job well done. These are such simple gestures we all took for granted but they connected us as sympathetic, supportive individuals that cared for each other. 

In my opinion, human contact is severely under rated. Without it we become immune to others' pain, joys and feelings. We become "neutrals" to each other in this world of beings.

I mourn the loss of these touchy/feely experiences.....for those of us who know what we are missing and even more for those who will never know the pleasures of a caring, supportive and demonstrative human touch.

Day 54

There are milestones in my life that I vividly remember. Some are related to emotional events and some are related to physical events.

I remember my first date with the person I would eventually marry. We were such different people, that friends couldn't understand the dating connection and they certainly didn't think the marriage would last beyond a year or two.  And here we are, 56+ years later approaching our 57th anniversary.

I remember in great detail the births of my two children.

And, I remember going to bed at 49 years of age looking just fine...fit and in good shape...and waking up with body parts that were 4 inches lower and 4 inches wider than they were the day before. 

  How that happened is beyond me, but I've learned to live with the results.

What has happened over the past 54 days has been more subtle and more insidious.

I stepped out of the shower yesterday and looked in the mirror.  (Big mistake)

I now realize that when this isolation period is over, that if someone comes up behind me to give me a hug around my waist, that I am going to be fondled instead of hugged.

Forget an anti-virus vaccine.  I want an anti-gravity vaccine.

Day 53

I feel like a new person this morning. Finally, the person looking back at me in the mirror is "Me" again.

Yesterday I had the chance to go to my hairdresser for color and to Suzanne for a cut n' style.  Omg, Giselle and Suzanne worked wonders on my hair.

I walked in with my wig covering up my pathetic looking hair and walked out with a luxurious mane of hair.

It took 3 1/2 hours for the magic to work, but what this did for my sense of well-being is unbelievable.

The sun is brighter today.  The smell of gardenias is filling the air.  The birds are singing louder. I'm smiling bigger.  And, yes, I feel pretty.

 

Oh, and the tape on my mask worked just perfectly.  I had other women comment on how efficient that was and said they'd use tape in the future as well.  (Credit for the mask goes to my dear friend, Vivian Fernandez.)

In case you're interested, these are the steps of progression from before to after.

Day 52

I am so giddy with anticipation!  I feel like a teenager getting ready for a first date with the high school hunk!

I've polished my finger nails and toes nails.

I've lotioned my arms, legs and feet.

I've picked out the "right" outfit.

And I've selected a coordinating protective face mask.

I'm doing all this for a much needed appointment with Giselle, who is going to work her magic on me.

I know my expectations are high,  but what I'll see in my mind as the finished product is what's going to count.

I want to see spunk and sass and tough....all encased in a super body.

If I'm going to dream, then it's gonna be big!  And you just don't get bigger than this!

Day 51

What would ya'll do without me warning you of the pitfalls of trying new techniques and discovering time saving procedures?

You'd think I would learn that using medical tape, even if it's labeled "gentle removal", should be handled with care. You'd think that after several mishaps, I would give up and not ever go near it again. You'd think that, wouldn't you?

 Present day situation....

I am so fortunate to have a hair appointment tomorrow.  There are several procedures I'm going to have done to my hair .  It's highly recommended that clients wear face masks to the salon. So, I plan to do this.

Knowing that any bands behind my ears would obstruct the application of color and that those bands would make a haircut difficult, I tried to think of a solution.

And, of course, I thought of medical, paper tape.  I specifically bought wide tape that would be easy to apply and would be easy to remove.  I made sure it said "gentle removal".

Okay,

Step 1......remove the bands from the face mask

Step 2.....placing the face mask front side down on a flat surface, attach strips of tape                   along the sides of the face mask

Step 3......remove eyeglasses, and position the face mask over the nose and mouth                        area

Step 4......firmly press on the tape to make sure the mask is securely in place

Step 5......DO NOT add additional tape to the top of the face mask in the under eye area

Gentle removal, my arse!  Not from all areas of the face.

I'm  wondering when the scabs will form and how long before my face returns to normal.

Day 50

It's obvious by now, or it should be, that I am bored out of my mind.

I watch a lot of ads on FaceBook just because I have time to kill and I am always hoping to find new products I might be interested in or tutorials that might teach me something.

50 days into isolation and after many dollars spent I've  learned quite a few things...some good and some bad.

First, there is no way I would ever appear in an ad for those shaper panties. I just couldn't expose myself to that kind of scrutiny. These women are to be marveled for their self-confidence. But why are they always trying to squeeze into dresses that are 2 sizes too small?

Now, I'm not saying that I bought this shaper product, but once you pull them up over the tummy area and flatten the belly, that excess "skin" has to go somewhere. It doesn't just flatten.  Now maybe on a tall person, as it moves up the body it wouldn't be too noticeable, but on a short person it just moves up above the band of the shaper and just stays there in a roll.  The effect is somewhat comparable to wearing an inner tube and defeats the purpose of wearing it.

Also, tank top Spanx camisoles should come with instructions that tell you to step into them rather than pull them over your head.  "Why", you ask?  Because if not, they tend to curl up in a constricting band just under the armpits and will seriously restrict one's breathing, that's why.

And we've been fixated on our hair problems and finding solutions.

I've been seeing ads for hair thickening powers that contain fibers that look like real hair.  Simply spray and softly brush to blend.

I watched videos, tutorials and read testimonials

.

And, I ordered some.

It worked.  It filled in the thinner spots along the front of my hair. Perfect color, undetectable, the results were unbelievable.

BUT, I didn't follow the complete directions about placing the "plastic protector guard" along my hairline to control the spray.

 Do you see where this is going? 

Day 48

Is it just me? 

I've been getting some strange emails lately from businesses trying to sell me their products or services.

One was from a health food company asking if I'm sure I'm eating enough. I felt like taking a selfie of myself in a bathing suit and responding with, "I'm not sure.  You tell me."  

For sure, I'd be off their mailing list.

Then I got one from WOMAN WITHIN that included an online catalog for clothing for oversized women.  Are these people in cahoots?

And then there was a job offer from a Work From Home company. I got suspicious when the job requirements included the ability to engage in lengthy phone conversations and  the ability to be imaginative when describing relationships. But having nothing else to do, I thought I'd check it out and apply.

I failed the phone interview.

I was asked to use some nasty, dirty words in  some  sentences. 

My responses ......

"The toilets in our house haven't been cleaned in 42 days and there are stains and spots all over them and the floor." 

"We don't shower or bathe everyday to save on the water bill"

Apparently, that's not what they wanted to hear.

A while back I joined Nutrisystem and was successful in losing 27 pounds.  That was before the self isolation thing, and one pound has led to another and I'm starting on the program again before I regain the entire 27 pounds.

I read the instructions on how to cook  a breakfast package this morning. The breakfast was a one egg omelet, certainly not a huge portion.

But included in the directions was a reminder to refrigerate any leftovers.  Are you kidding me? The reason I and many others are even dealing with Nutrisystem is that we never have leftovers!  This omelet never had a chance to be a leftover.